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February 08, 2012
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New Post 4/25/2008 11:55 AM
User is offline Michael VanCleave
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Re: Bitterness 

Can you be specific about why you have bitterness toward the organized church?  What occurred to place this burden on your heart?

 
New Post 4/28/2008 11:30 PM
User is offline Christy Krabach
5 posts
www.gfautism.org
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Re: Bitterness 

Hmm. Initially (and still) the pettiness, snobbiness (aka holier-than-thou attitude), false demeanor of the people within the church. Growing up, we had our "Sunday faces"... the smiling happy look that tried to say that life was just great and everything was perfect. Nevermind the physical and verbal abuse going on in the home between the parents or between the parents and the children. Nevermind the tearing down of self esteem, destruction of the idea of parental concern, the suicide attempts, the runaway attempts, the violent arguments that occurred every day. As soon as we parked our car in the church parking lot, everything was magically "just peachy."

The church "family" who never stooped to help out another family within the church who had no water, no working furnace, and no washer or dryer while the father remained unemployed and the mother worked 3 jobs to try and make ends meet.

The hatred towards those who aren't Christian (or the right sort of Christian), gay, color, or social status (and if you don't think this is true in today's church, follow this link: http://www.lovegodsway.org/)

I won't even mention in detail the misquoting and warped conception of Jesus and the Bible.

The materialism within the church not just by the congregation, but the pastor as well (mentioned by Jeff K in a previous post).

The idea that the Kingdom of God exists within a church's walls and people must come to the church to partake of it.

Salvation as is taught in today's church.

Hell and the sale of "fire insurance" (as I like to call it).

I could go on for a while, but this would get redundant, and I suspect you get a general picture anyways. I'm not saying that every church is like this and that every Christian is like this. But if you walk up to someone who is outside the church and ask them how they'd stereotype the American church, I believe they'd say a lot of the same things I said.

I love people and it burns me up to see someone stating that God doesn't love this person or that person because of who they are or what they have done. I believe that Jesus came to this world to help the people... not to create a superior religion, a big beautiful church building, a bunch of mindless sheeple. He came in humility and love... something that I feel is sorely lacking in most churches (and Christian's hearts).

 

 

 

 

 
New Post 4/29/2008 11:35 AM
User is offline Chris Dilbone
12 posts
www.myspace.com/exit179
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Re: Bitterness 

I have often said that if you want to be mistreated, abused, used, and abandoned just hand around the church for a while.

I agree with your assessment of today's view of "churchdom" or "american christianity."  It can be a bit depressing to hear how many people out there view followers of Christ. 

However, with all of these things said...what are we going to do about it?  How do we best teach, rebuke, correct, encourage the people who say they follow Jesus?  How do we best demonstrate the love that has been born in us? 

At this point in our lives, after physically leaving the institution a couple of years ago, we are at the place where we have one foot inside and one foot outside the "institutional church."(which I never wanted to do...I never wanted to look back)  We have neighbors that go to a church building in town and somehow we've developed some key relationships with people there including the Pastor.  He is, by the way, one of the most kingdom minded pastors I have ever met in my life(shock...disbelief...).  We get very little if anything out of going to this place(not that it's about that anyway).  My band actually leads there once a month at their "contemporary" service which is tough because I disagree with so much of what the church is and the "entertainment" factor of it all, yet we find ourselves following the Spirit there on occasion. 

We have a purpose in going to this place and being in relationship with some of these folks.   It isn't to get something, but to demonstrate Jesus' love to them and for them so they can see it in action.  These folks at this church building are actually feeding the hungry one night a week and they also have a furniture pantry for people in need, so we have partnered with them in the things that are important to us and the kingdom.  They are doing some kingdom things for sure, but for many of the people involved the reality of demonstrating the love of Jesus through these actions is not even on the radar screen.  This is where we come in with the questions I asked above.  What are we going to do?  My focus used to be(and often times still is if you know me very well) on everything that's wrong, what needs corrected, that the church as we know it is broken...etc...etc... But, the spirit has given us a love again for the people that follow Jesus even in their sometimes distorted and much maligned ways.  Of course we very much prefer the simple organic expressions of the church in our community, but we'll go and do as the spirit guides even if it means darkening the doors of the institution once again on occasion.

We are the light of the world...everywhere we are...Here are some lyrics from David Crowder that have meant a lot to my wife and I lately:

When all the love in the world
Is right here among us
And hatred too
And so we must choose
What our hands will do

Where there is pain
Let there be grace
Where there is suffering
Bring serenity
For those afraid
Help them be brave
Where there is misery
Bring expectancy
And surely we can change
Surely we can change
Something

By David Crowder

 
New Post 8/4/2008 10:24 AM
User is offline Marti Lambert
4 posts
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Re: Bitterness 

Christy,

     I haven't been on the site for a while and missed your posts about bitterness.  I am right in the middle of this myself.  I think many people see bitterness coming from anger and of course anger is involved.  I think for the most part bitterness takes root because of hurt.   I am deeply hurt right now and with all of my spiritual strength I am trying not to allow that hurt to start a root of bitterness.  If I am right than the answer to bitterness is healing of the hurt.    In Psalms 23 David says "he restores my soul"   I believe that is healing.  I am seeking God right now to restore my soul.  Satan has used men in leadership who I respected and admired to hurt me deeply.  I am trying to deal with that hurt as well as recognize that Satan desires to defeat me. "my struggle is not against flesh and blood"

   My biggest fear about bitterness is that it is a stronghold.  It isn't something I can let remain.  It is described in scripture as "a root of bitterness"  because it doesn't just sit there inside us. it expands and grows giving Satan a foothold.    As you see, I do not have the answers but wanted you to know I am with you in this struggle.  I will keep you in my prayers.  Chris is right forgiveness is necessary/  I believe have forgiven but the hurt still drags me toward bitterness.

 
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